If you lined up every guy Selena Gomez has ever dated—The Weeknd, Zayn, Bieber—you probably wouldn’t guess Benny Blanco would be next.

And yet… here we are.

One of the world’s biggest pop stars is proudly dating a producer who literally describes himself as a “little troll”

So what’s going on here? Did the dating simulation glitch? Not at all.

Benny’s story is a reality check for every guy who’s ever looked in the mirror and thought: “I’m not hot enough to pull a girl like that.”

1. Emotional Safety Is the Modern Green Flag

According to Selena, Benny “has treated me better than any human being on this planet.” That’s not about looks. That’s about emotional safety—and it’s the modern green flag.

That’s not about money. Or status. Or jawlines. That’s about emotional safety—the most underrated, misunderstood green flag of all time.

Benny shows up for Selena. He hypes her up. He doesn’t disappear for days to “maintain mystery.” He’s consistent, open, and present. 

That kind of presence is rare—and deeply attractive. When a woman feels safe, she opens up. She stops scanning for red flags and starts imagining a future. Emotional safety isn’t something you perform. It’s something you build. And in today’s dating world, it’s basically a cheat code.

What this means for you: Learn how to regulate your own emotions so she doesn’t have to. Be consistent. Communicate clearly. Respect her independence. When you move like a man who’s grounded, women stop seeing you as a gamble—and start seeing you as home.

2. He’s a hype man, not a competitor

Benny Blanco is Selena’s biggest hype man. He doesn’t just support her—he brags about her. He’s constantly celebrating her accomplishments, her creativity, her personality—even her cooking. 

And he does it without needing to make it about himself. There’s zero trace of insecurity. That’s what makes it powerful.

A lot of guys get weird when their partner is successful or well-known. They think masculinity means taking up all the space. Being a man who celebrates his girl, instead of acting insecure about her success — that’s high-level behavior.

What this means for you: Start complimenting more. And don’t do it to get something in return. Praise her because you mean it. Support her without conditions. Be the guy who’s proud, not the guy who’s performatively “supportive” but lowkey competitive. Women can tell the difference.

3. It’s Not Cringe, It’s Courage

Benny doesn’t play it cool. He doesn’t hide how obsessed he is.

He doesn’t “wait three hours to text back because alpha male TikTok said so.” He’s out here posting her selfies with captions like “She’s the best thing that ever happened to me.”

And guess what? It works because he means it.

In a world full of breadcrumbing, ghosting, and emotionally limp “situationships,” being transparent is the new rebellion.

What this means for you: Stop trying to be the most emotionally unavailable man in her life. That’s not mysterious—it’s exhausting. Say what you feel. Be bold.

4. Imperfection Is the Flex

Benny Blanco is not trying to be cool—and that’s exactly why he is. He’s awkward. He’s funny. He wears whatever he wants. He owns his insecurities instead of hiding behind filters or fake confidence.

People are drawn to authenticity, especially in a world where everything feels overly edited. Benny’s charm doesn’t come from pretending to have it all together. It comes from being totally fine with who he is.

What this means for you: Be the guy who’s not afraid to be awkward. Say the thing. Make the joke. Be present without polishing every second of your personality. And yes—take care of yourself. Not to impress, but because it shows self-respect.

5. Humor hits different

Let’s be real—Benny isn’t Brad Pitt. But it doesn't matter. He’s hilarious and  that’s exactly what makes him stand out. 

Humor is one of the top traits women consistently rank as attractive, not just because it’s fun, but because it reveals deeper strengths: social awareness, emotional flexibility, and quiet confidence.

Benny doesn’t need to be a stand-up comic—he just knows how to lean into the moment, laugh at himself, and keep things light. 

When you can laugh at your awkward moments, tease her playfully without crossing the line, and keep things fun even when life isn’t perfect, you’re showing a rare kind of presence. That’s magnetic in a world full of people taking themselves way too seriously.

You Don’t Need to Be a “10”

Benny Blanco is walking proof that women are not just looking for looks. You don’t need six-pack abs and a granite jawline. You need self-awareness and to treat women like they’re not NPCs in your Instagram highlight reel.

Show up — and be someone worth showing up for.

- Forte team